Lesbian Dating: Finding Your Perfect Partner

The world of online dating has changed the game entirely for lesbian women. While many used to meet partners at dedicated clubs or events, online lesbian dating has made starting potential relationships a lot easier, while popular phone apps have made hook-ups with other local women easier and safer. Our comparison table below lists some of the best online dating websites for women looking for women.

Company Cost Description Features Rating Website
From £27.95/month Find other professional, gay women.
  • For working, affluent professionals
  • Mobile apps
  • Free membership (limited features)
  • Automatic match suggestions
  • Detailed personality profile
9.6
out of 10

Visit Elite Singles
From £12.95/month Match up with other gay women based on compaibility.
  • 3.5 million UK members
  • Mobile apps
  • Free membership (limited features)
  • Unique matchmaking system
  • Unlimited messages
8.8
out of 10

Visit eHarmony

Dating is confusing sometimes, and when you’re a woman looking to date other women, it can be fraught with complications! For a start, how do you meet other women you have hobbies or interests in common with? And, secondly, how do you know that the woman who has caught your eye is also interested in women?

How to meet other lesbian women

If you are a woman hoping to meet other women, finding out about your local gay scene is a good start. Do you know which nightclubs have gay nights? Or where there are gay pubs or events in your town or city?

The number of activities will vary depending on where you live: large, metropolitan cities are likely to have a lively, thriving LGBT social scene, while smaller towns may just have a few events and venues to go to.

Some lesbians and bi women also struggle with the fact that many of the LGBT events are male dominated, and also that they are frequently held at venues with a bar; if you don’t want to drink constantly, or can’t drink alcohol for any reason, you might find yourself feeling excluded from what’s on offer.

So, as well as frequenting any gay events that you can, you will also want other ways to meet other LGBT women, and online lesbian dating is perfect for this. On the major dating websites, you can tick a box to indicate whether you are interested in men, women or both, and there are also niche dating sites especially for LGBT women who want to meet others.

The larger sites are a good place to start, and don’t be put off if they charge a fee. Paying for a lesbian dating website membership can actually turn out to be a positive, because paid accounts put people off who aren’t taking dating seriously. You’re far less likely to come across fake accounts or time wasters when people have to give their bank card details and pay, even though it is only a few pounds a month.

Next, fill in your profile, including your interests and hobbies, so that other women can see whether they think you will have anything in common. Put a nice, recent photo with a clear view of your face, and be honest about your personal information. Don’t give away too much when you first start chatting to somebody – you need to stay safe and secure – then, if there’s a sense of attraction, start flirting!

But is she lesbian or not?

If you are dating online, it will be fairly clear whether a woman you have taken a liking to is also interested in women. She will be on a lesbian dating website or she will have selected to see other women’s profiles. You can get chatting and find out whether she has dated other women or whether you’d be her first, and you can also talk about whether she is out to her friends and family or not.

If you meet a woman on the gay scene, you might think it’s obvious that she must also be gay, but bear in mind that there are straight people who sometimes go out to gay clubs, too. In the same way as if you meet a woman at work or at a straight event, you will need to establish whether she’s also LGBT, and whether or not she’ll be interested in you.

It can be a bit scary, but the only true way to do this is to communicate openly and clearly. You can ask her questions about her most recent relationship, or where she goes to socialise, and both of these will give you an indication. But the only way to ultimately find out is to talk to her directly about it.

A lot of women get around this by coming out, themselves, and then asking – sensitively – about their friend’s sexuality while they are on the topic. Try it, and you might just be surprised!


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